its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Sober January is a disaster.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
