I only kidnapped one of them. chill
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
