Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
