I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
