Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
