rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
