I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
