Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
