we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
