He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
organizing the empties. That sober.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
