but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize
