I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
