I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
