i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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