I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
