I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
