Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
