honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
