That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Randomize
