I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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