i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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