Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
