She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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