he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
