I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
