My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize