But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
