How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
