I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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