yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
