i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
