yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
