i barfeds in our rink
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
