i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
