Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
