awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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