so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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