does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize