will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
