I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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