Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
