My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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