Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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