Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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