About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
