so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
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