Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Randomize
