oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
