After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Please, let me fuck your mom
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
