38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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