were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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